Humor and Cartoons

A slice of bread The fellow was a regular customer at the restaurant, and the management tried to please him. When he complained that only one piece of bread was served with his meal, the waiter brought him four slices the next night. “That’s better,” said the man, “but not

Optician Waiting for my glasses to be repaired, I heard the optician trying to convince a customer she needed a stronger prescription. “I’m fine with what I have,” she insisted. “Okay,” he challenged, “what does it say on the store window across the street?” “‘30% to 40% off all merchandise’

“Adoption” Teacher Debbie Moon’s first graders were discussing a picture of a family. One little boy in the picture had a different hair color than the other members. One of her students suggested that he was adopted. A little girl said, “I know all about adoption, I was adopted.” “What

“Prenatal Visit” A couple was making their first visit to Dr. Mike Wilson prior to the birth of their first child. After the exam, the doctor took a small stamp and stamped the wife’s stomach with indelible ink. The man and his wife were curious about what the stamp was

Am I Normal? During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director what the criterion was which defined whether or not a patient should be institutionalized. “Well,” said the Director, “we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the

Same bed An older couple was asking for a room with a king, queen or double bed. The clerk apologized and said that the only rooms available had twin beds. Disappointed, the man remarked, “I don’t know. We’ve been sharing the same bed for 44 years.” “Could you possibly put

Fishing A couple of young lads were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bushes jumped the Game Warden. Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods like a bat out of hell, and hot on his

Jumping on beds Connie told her 4-year-old grandson, Dean, not to jump on the beds. After several warnings she punished him, explaining that should he fall, he would hurt himself badly. Several minutes passed and he was back to jumping on the beds. Connie said, “Dean, you weren’t jumping on

Signing a cheque Louise went into her bank to cash a cheque. She looked so hesitant that the cashier went to help her. ‘Please sign the back of the cheque, ‘the teller told her, ‘as you’d sign a letter.’ Louise looked extremely grateful, scribbled on the cheque and passed it

Lost Bible The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range. Three weeks later a cow walked up carrying the Bible in it’s mouth. The cowboy couldn’t believe his eyes. He took the book out of the cow’s mouth, raised his eyes heavenward