Jumping on beds
Connie told her 4-year-old grandson, Dean, not to jump on the beds. After several warnings she punished him, explaining that should he fall, he would hurt himself badly.
Several minutes passed and he was back to jumping on the beds.
Connie said, “Dean, you weren’t jumping on the beds again, were you?”
He stood with his little head dropped low and said,
“I’m trying, but it’s so hard to quit.”
Exam Help
The final exam in electrical engineering worried my son, Don.
On the last day of class, the professor wished the students luck as he wrote a phone number on the blackboard.
“If any of you have difficulty understanding the review material, call this number,” he said as he dismissed the class.
On Saturday afternoon, stumped by one of the review problems, Don reached for the phone and heard a recorded message from Dial-A-Prayer.
No Horns
The Monday Afternoon Club, an organization of wealthy city women, met and decided that this month’s outing was to be at a dairy farm. Most of them had lived in the city all their lives, and had never seen such a thing.
The day came, and the ladies filed into the rented bus which whisked them off to their destination. On the way, they watched out the windows as the city squalor turned into lovely, unpolluted countryside.
After they arrived, they were greeted by the farmer who invited them to look him up should they have any questions.
Myrtle, after looking about, and being amazed by what she saw, stepped into a building and viewed something she thought was quite remarkable. She saw the farmer walk by and hailed him – he sauntered in.
“Sir,” she inquired, “Why doesn’t this cow have any horns?”
The farmer cocked his head for a moment, then began in a patient tone: “Well, ma’am, cattle can do a powerful lot of damage with horns. Sometimes we keep’ em trimmed down with a hacksaw. Other times we can fix up the young ‘uns by puttin’ a couple drops of acid where their horns would grow in, and that stops ’em cold.
Still, there are some breeds of cattle that never grow horns. But the reason this cow don’t have no horns, ma’am, is ’cause it’s a horse.”
