Humor Quotes

The more studying you did for the exam, the less sure you are as to which answer they want.

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he’s buying.

Politicians are wonderful people as long as they stay away from things they don’t understand, such as working for a living. P. J. Orourke

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen

Dieting is the penalty for exceeding the feed limit

Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world. But they are also terrorists. You’ll realize this as soon as they are born, and they start using sleep deprivation to break you.

“They say kids brighten the home – that’s because they never turn the lights off.”

Did you know, 50% of doctors graduated in the bottom half of their class?

If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you