Humor Quotes

Always be sincere, even if you don’t mean it.

The thing about the future is that it arrives one day at a time.

I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid. But he says he can stop any time.

Efficiency is intelligent laziness.

On a church postcard: “I have received Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. I would like a personal call.”

“The early bird may get the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese.”

Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.

If you aim at nothing, you’ll hit it every time.

The early bird may get the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese.

“There are only three kinds of people: Those who are good in math and those who are not.”