An optimist thinks
An optimist thinks that this is the best possible world.A pessimist fears that this is true.
An optimist thinks Read More »
I broke my leg in two places
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places…
I broke my leg in two places Read More »
I thought about
I thought about how mothers feed their babies with little tiny spoons and forks, so I wonder what Chinese mothers use. Toothpicks?
I’m not afraid to die
“I’m not afraid to die. I just don’t want to be there when it happens.”
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To double your money
The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket
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If you think nobody cares
If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
If you think nobody cares Read More »
Never test the depth of water
Never test the depth of the water with both feet
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What has four legs
What has four legs, is big, green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? A pool table.
What has four legs Read More »
A committee is a group of people
A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.
A committee is a group of people Read More »
What do prisoners use?
What do prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones.
What do prisoners use? Read More »