Humor Quotes

It’s so cold this morning…when I turned on the shower, I got hail.

Sleeping with the light on may cause obesity…Especially if it’s the refrigerator light.

I’ve gone away to find myself. Should I return before I get back, please keep me here.

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

What’s the worst thing about buying a new boomerang? Throwing away the old one.

It’s so cold this morning…I opened my Outlook and had frost on my Windows.

If there was a Pessimist Award, I doubt if I could win it.

My memory is SO bad I changed my password to “incorrect.” That way when I enter the wrong one, it’ll tell me, “Your password is incorrect.”

“Support bacteria – they’re the only culture some people have.”

Someone showed me how static electricity worked today. I was shocked.