A Kitty Funny
A couple were going out for the evening. They’d got ready, all dolled up, set the lights, and put the cat out.
The taxi arrives, and as the couple opened the front door, the cat zips back in between their legs and disappears up the stairs. They don’t want the cat shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to find the cat and put it out.
The wife, worried about some recent break-ins in their neighborhood and not wanting it known that the house will be empty, explains to the taxi driver “He’s just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother.”
A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab apologetically, “Sorry I took so long” he says, “Stupid old thing was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger and grab her by the scruff of the neck to get her to come out! Then she slipped away and ran into the closet, but I quickly trapped her in the corner and got a good hold on her.”
ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.
I couldn’t find my luggages at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. “ Now,” she asked me, has your plane arrived yet?”