The diner was furious when his steak arrived too rare. “Waiter,” he barked, “didn’t you hear me say ‘well done’?
“I can’t thank you enough, sir,” replied the waiter.
“I hardly ever get a compliment.”Losing Weight Walter was sitting in the doctor’s office for his annual physical, going over a few fine points about his health with his doctor.
The doctor said, “Your blood pressure is a little high, Walter. You need to watch your diet and lose a little weight.”
“But doc, I’m losing weight more and more each day.”
“Oh, really? How are you doing it?” asked the doctor.
“Well, just six weeks ago, I’d eat lunch at 12:00 and have a snack around 3:00. Just today, I had breakfast at 7:30, waited two hours, had a snack at 9:30 and then I waited an hour and a half and ate lunch at 11:00. Then I waited 45 minutes and had a snack before coming here.”
“And with this regiment, you’re losing weight?” asked the doctor.
“Yeah,” Walter said excitedly. “More meals and less wait!”
As my five-year-old-son and I were headed to McDonald’s one day, we passed a car accident.
Usually when we see something terrible like that, we say a prayer for those who might be hurt, so I pointed and said to my son, “We should pray.”
From the back seat I heard his earnest request: “Please, God, don’t let those cars block the entrance to McDonald’s.”