Hold for the Picture
A park ranger in the Everglades was making his rounds a couple of summers ago when a woman came bolting out of the weeds right in front of his truck. She seemed frantic and he finally got her calm enough to say that her five- year-old son was sitting on the back of an alligator.
Now, the ranger was frantic. Running in the direction she was pointing, he found the lad astride a twelve foot male alligator that was trying to relieve itself of its load by twisting and snapping. As the brave ranger moved in, he tried to console the mother by saying, “I think I can grab the boy and move away before the gator moves. Be ready to grab your son. I may have to shoot the gator.”
To which the lady replies, “Good Heavens, no! Don’t shoot him. I just wanted you to make him hold still for a minute so I could take my son’s picture on his back!”
“How was your blind date?” a college student asked her 21 year old roommate.
“Terrible!” the roommate answered. “He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce.”
“Wow! That’s a very expensive classic car. What’s so bad about that?”
“He was the original owner.”
My granddaughter came to spend a few weeks with me, and I decided to teach her to sew.
After I had gone through a lengthy explanation of how to thread the machine, she stepped back, put her hands on her hips, and said in disbelief, “You mean you can do all that, but you can’t operate my Game Boy?”