The other day I pointed to a couple across a restaurant and said to my wife, “That’s us in ten years.”
She replied, “That’s a mirror.”
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Old age: When you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it.
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“Self-esteem-boosting tip: Whenever you receive mail addressed to “resident,” just write a big “P” in front of that to make yourself feel more important.”
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“When one door closes another one opens, you should really get that cabinet fixed!”