CartoonGod is Watching

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of
their elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of
apples. The teacher made a note, and posted it on the apple tray.

It said, “Take only one. God is

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other
end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.

A child had written a note, “Take all you
want. God is watching the apples.”

Born in Japan

Stationed in Okinawa, Japan,
my son and his wife were expecting their first baby. I was elated when he
called me at work all the way from Japan with the news of my
grandchild’s birth. I took down all the statistics and turned to relate it all
to my co-workers.

“I’m a grandmother!”
I declared. “It’s a baby girl and she weighs five pounds.”

“When was she born?”
someone asked.

Recalling the date my son told
me, I stopped, looked at the calendar and said in amazement, “Tomorrow!”


After driving up and down several lanes, I finally
found a parking spot at the shopping mall. I noticed another man driving very
slowly in the same direction, and, since he was closer, I gave him the
“Are you going to park there?” look.

His responding gestures were very confusing. First
he shook his head. Next he pointed at me, then at the parking space and then at
himself, his watch and the mall. Finishing off, he frowned, raised his palms
upward and shrugged. Once I parked, I walked over to the driver to make sure he
didn’t want the space.

“You must be single,” he replied.
“If you were married, you would’ve known that was the universal sign for
‘Go ahead and take the spot. I’m waiting for my wife.'”

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