Cat Romance
A tom cat and a tabby were courting on a back fence one night.
The tom leaned over to the tabby with pent up passion and purred, “I’d die for you!”
The tabby gazed at him from under lowered eye lids and asked, “How many times?”
The New Job
Billy Bob walks into a bar and says, “Bartender, one round for everyone, on me!”
The bartender says, “Well, seems you’re in a really good mood tonight, hm?”
Billy Bob says, “Oh, you can bet on it! I just got hired by the city to go around and remove all the money from parking meters. I start on Monday!” The bartender congratulates him and proceeds to pour the round.
Monday evening arrives. Billy Bob comes back into the bar and says Bartender, TWO rounds for everyone, on me!”
The bartender says, “Well now! If you’re so happy just over having this new job, I can just imagine how happy you’ll be when you get your paycheck!”
Billy Bob looks at the bartender with a wondrous look on his face, pulls out a handful of quarters from his pocket, and says “You mean they’ll PAY me too?”
Turtle Ears
Tradition here in the office is to keep a notepad with the punch lines from the various jokes that pass through.
I was flipping pages and found “Turtles have such tiny ears!”
I couldn’t remember the joke. After searching everyone’s memory banks, one of the folks remembered:
“Why is turtle wax so expensive?”
