Telephone call
A screenwriter comes home to a burned down house. His sobbing wife is standing outside. “What happened, honey?” the man asks.
“Oh, John, it was terrible,” she weeps. “I was cooking when the phone rang. It was your agent. Because I was on the phone, I didn’t notice the stove had caught on fire. It went up in seconds. Everything is gone. I nearly didn’t make it out of the house. Poor Fluffy is gone……..”
“Wait! Back up a minute,” the man says. “My agent called?”
Difference
When my wife and I went up to New England a couple of years ago we decided to stay in one of those quaint little inns.
The clerk at the inn asked me if we wanted a room with a shower or a tub.
“What’s the difference?” I asked.
“Well, sir, in a tub, you can sit down.”
Overloading
The flight attendant watched a passenger try to stuff his hopelessly overloaded bags into the overhead bin.
Finally she informed him that he would have to check the oversized luggage.
“When I fly other airlines,” he said irritably, “I never have this problem!”
She smiled and said, “Sir, when you fly other airlines, I don’t have this problem either.”
