Mess Sign
A sign posted on the wall of an Army mess read, “Don’t Waste Food — Food will win the war.”
Beneath someone had written, “That’s fine, but how do we get the enemy to eat it?”
Con-artist
What do you call a movie made by a con-artist that is very interesting?
A con-flick of interest!
Exploration
A man was walking through a German forest when he saw this deep cave, so he decided to go exploring. He walked in a ways and saw a flickering light far ahead so he walked to it.
He was surprised to find an old man with a large stack of music scores in front of him. The old man was rubbing the notes off of the paper and laying the blank sheets aside.
The walker was astonished when he saw who he thought the man was. It seemed to be Mozart! He asked, “Are you Mozart?”
“Yes”, the old man replied.
“Would that be Wolfgang Mozart?”
Again the reply was “Yes.”
“Well, you’ve been dead for centuries. What are doing rubbing notes off of music?”
The old man looked up, “I’m decomposing!”
Family Support
The prospective father-in-law asked, “Young man, can you support a family?”
The surprised groom-to-be replied, “Well, no. I was just planning to support your daughter. The rest of you will have to fend for yourselves.”
Historic Recall
Ms. Crabtree had been telling her 1st grade class the story of the discovery of America by Columbus.
She concluded with, “And all this happened more than 500 years ago.”
“Wow!” exclaimed Little Johnny, “What a great memory you have!”
