American Football
A guy decides to bring his new girlfriend to a football game. After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game.
She replies: “Oh it was great, but there is one thing I don’t understand.”
“What don’t you understand?”
The girlfriend replies, “Well, at the beginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. So I thought to myself, “What the heck, it’s just a quarter!”
Sporty Humor Quote
Football is not a contact sport; it is a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport.
Sunday School
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her 4th grade class.
After explaining the commandment to honor thy father and mother, she asked, “Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?”
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, “Thou shall not kill.”
Needing the toilet
On the first day of school, the kindergarten teacher said, “If anyone has to go to the bathroom, hold up two fingers.”
A little voice from the back of the room asked, “How will that help?”
