Bus Fare to Train Station
Before boarding a bus, a man asked the driver, “What is the fare to the train station?”
“Sixty cents,” said the driver.
The man raced alongside the bus until the next stop and then gasped, “What is the fare now?”
“Ninety cents,” said the driver. “You’re running the wrong way.”
Nervous Young Minister
A nervous young minister, new to the church, told the flock, “For my text today, I will take the words, ‘And they fed five men with five thousand loaves of bread and two thousand fishes.'”
A member of the flock raised his hand and said, “That’s not much of a trick. I could do that.”
The minister didn’t respond. However, the next Sunday he decided to repeat the text. This time he did it properly: “And they fed five thousand men with five loaves of bread and two fishes.”
Smiling, the minister said to the noisy man, “Could you do that, Mr. Perkins?”
The member of the flock said, “I sure could.”
“How would you do it?”
“With all the food I had left over from last Sunday!”
Geometry Homework
“Son, I’ve asked you before NOT to do your geometry homework at the dinner table!”
“But why, Ma?” I asked. “What is wrong with that?”
“Look,” she said, “the proof is in the pudding.”
