My friend’s husband is always telling her that housekeeping would be a snap if only she would organize her time better.
Recently, he had a chance to put his theory into practice while his wife was away. When I popped in one evening to see how he was managing, he crowed, “I made a cake, frosted it, washed the kitchen windows, cleaned all the cupboards, scrubbed the kitchen floor, walls and ceiling and even had a bath.”
I was about to concede that perhaps he was a better manager than his wife, when he added sheepishly, “When I was making the chocolate frosting, I forgot to turn off the mixer before taking the beaters out of the bowl, so I had to do all the rest.”
“Doctor, I’d like you to evaluate my 13-year-old son.”
“He’s suffering from a transient psychosis with an intermittent rage disorder, punctuated by episodic radical mood swings, but his prognosis is good for a full recovery.”
“How can you say all of that without even meeting him?”
“Didn’t you say he was 13?”
Out of Town
This guy was watching TV as his wife was out cutting the grass during the hot summer. He finally worked up the energy to go out and ask his wife what was for supper.
Well, his wife was quite irritated about him sitting in the air conditioned house all day while she did all the work, so she scolded him. “I can’t believe you’re asking me about supper right now! Imagine I’m out of town, go inside and figure dinner out yourself.”
So, he went back in the house and fixed himself a big steak with potatoes, garlic bread and a tall glass of iced tea.
His wife finally walked in about the time he was finishing up and asked him, “You fixed something to eat? So, where’s mine?”
“Huh? I thought you were out of town.”