Favorite parable
“What is your favorite parable?” the Sunday school teacher asked Little Johnny. He answered, “I like the one where every- body loafs and fishes.”
Who wants and who does
“Remember…a developer is someone who wants to build a house in the woods. An environmentalist is someone who already owns a house in the woods.”
Foreign language
A Swiss guy, visiting the U.S., pulled up at a bus stop where two locals were waiting.
“Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?” he asked.
The two Yanks just stared at him.
“Excusez-moi, parlez vous Francais?” he tried. The two continued to stare.
“Parlare Italiano?”
Other than a glance at each other, there was still no response.
“Hablan ustedes Espanol?”
Still nothing.
The Swiss guy gave up and drove off. The first Yank turned to the second and said, “Y’know, maybe we should learn a foreign language.”
“Why?” the other replied. “That guy knew four languages, and it didn’t do him any good.”
Bad potato
Not long ago I met the waitress of my dreams.
About halfway through dinner I called the waitress over and said, “Ma’am, this potato is bad.”
She nodded, picked up the potato and smacked it. Then she put it back on my plate and said, “Sir, if that potato causes any more trouble, you just let me know.”
