“Junk is something you’ve kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.”
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Stockbroker
Called my stockbroker this morning and asked him what I should be buying and he said, “Canned goods and ammunition.”
Bad Luck
My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying. (Ed Furgol)
Humor quote
It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.
Thanking
“My father spent the last 20 years of his life writing letters. If someone thanked him for a wedding present, he thanked them for thanking…