Waiter, waiter!!

Waiter, do you serve crabs?

Yes sir, we serve anybody.


Waiter, waiter. I don’t like the flies in here.

Well come back tomorrow sir, we’ll have some new ones by then.


“Waiter! There’s a dead spider in my soup.”

“Yes I know, sir. It’s the heat that kills them.”


Customer: Could I have a puppy for my son please?

Pet Shop Assistant: Sorry sir, we don’t do swops.


A doctor sent a bill to his patient. Underneath the bill he wrote:

“This bill is now one year old.”

Back came the reply: “Happy Birthday!”


Your pit bull just chased the postman down the road on his bike.

You must be mistaken my dog hasn’t got a bike.

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