“Sick Call”
Mr. Frobisher constantly called Dr. Wilson at all hours of the day and night and would then keep him on the phone with a litany of imagined ailments.
Finally the doctor could take it no longer. “Listen, Mr. Frobisher, if you wake me up again in the middle of the night with another one of your tales about some made-up ailment, I am going to insist you see another physician. Have I made myself clear?”
A week later, Mr. Frobisher slipped and fell down a flight of stairs, breaking his hip, two ribs, an elbow, and suffering a concussion. He was rushed to the hospital and put in intensive care.
An hour later, Dr. Wilson walked in, saw his condition, and exclaimed “I think you’re finally getting the hang of it!”
Personality Test
When we finished a personality assessment at work, I asked my friend, Dan, if he would share the results with his wife.
“That would require me to go home and say, ‘Hi, honey. I just paid someone $400 to tell me what’s wrong with me,'” he said. “And based on that, considering we’ve been married 23 years, she’d hand me a bill for about $798,000.”
Eating Pennies
One evening, my husband and I heard sobbing coming from our three-year-old, Billy’s, room. We found him crying hysterically. He had accidentally swallowed a penny and was sure he was going to die. No amount of talking could change his mind.
Desperate to calm him, my husband palmed a penny he happened to have in his pocket and pretended to pull it from Billy’s ear.
Billy was delighted. In a flash, he snatched it from my husband’s hand, swallowed it and demanded cheerfully, “Do it again, Dad!”
The Wedding Ring
My husband, Mike, and I had several stressful months of financial difficulties. So, one evening, I was touched to see him gazing at the diamond wedding ring that symbolized our marriage.
“With this ring…” I began romantically.
“We could pay off the Visa,” he responded.
