Horseshoe Impression
One day a cowboy walked into a blacksmith shop and picked up a horseshoe, not realizing that it had just come from the forge. He immediately dropped it and jammed his hand into his pocket, trying to act as if nothing had happened. The blacksmith noticed and asked with a grin, “Kind of hot, wasn’t it?”
“Nope,” answered the cowboy through clenched teeth, “it just doesn’t take me long to look at a horseshoe.”
Forced Landing
A flight instructor was sent out to help a student who had radioed that he was about to make a forced landing a few miles from the base. The instructor spotted the plane standing in a field small enough to present a real challenge to his professional reputation.
With determination, full flaps and engine just above the stall, he landed in the field. Climbing out, he shouted angrily to the student, “Just how did you manage to get into such a small field?”
“I landed in the big field over there,” the student explained, “but in order to leave room for you to land, I had the farmer tow me here.”
Freedom Peppers
A man walks up to a cashier in a grocery store. He says, “Hey, how much for these jalapeño peppers?” He pronounces it “jo-la-pen-o,” not “ho-lo-peen-yo.”
The cashier says, “Sir, that’s not what those peppers are called.”
The man replies, “Listen, Bru, this is Africa, and I can pronounce any word the way I please.”
The cashier responds, “That is as may be, sir, but those are green peppers.”
