It was graduation day and Mom was trying to take a
picture of their son in his cap and gown, posed with his father.
“Let’s try to make this look natural,” she said.
“Junior, put your arm around your dad’s shoulder.”
The father said,
“If you want it to look natural, why not have him put his hand on my
wallet?”
I’ve been told that a way to feel better is to finish things I have
started.
Today I finished 2
bags of potato chips and a chocolate cake.
I feel better already.
A man in his 40s bought a new BMW and was out on the
interstate for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing
through what was left of his hair and he decided to open her up.
As the needle jumped up to 80 mph, he suddenly saw
flashing red and blue lights behind him.
“There’s no way they can catch a BMW,” he
thought to himself and opened her up further. The needle hit 90, 100 and then
the reality of the situation hit him.
“What am I doing”? he thought and pulled over.
The cop came up to him, took his license without a word,
examined it and the car.
“It’s been a long day, this is the end of my shift
and it’s Friday the 13th. I don’t feel like more paperwork, so if you can give
me an excuse for your driving that I haven’t heard before, you can go.”
The guy thinks for a second and says, “Last week, my
wife ran off with a cop. I was afraid it was you and you were trying to give
her back.”
