Mother was sick with the flu.
Her darling daughter wanted to be a good nurse. She fluffed the pillows and
brought a magazine for her mother to read. And then she showed up with a cup of
tea.
“You’re such a
sweetheart,” the mother said as she drank the tea. “I didn’t know you
could make tea.”
“Oh, yes,” the little
girl replied. “I put the tea leaves in the water like you do, and I boiled
it, and then I strained it into a cup. But I couldn’t find a strainer, so I
used the flyswatter.”
“You what?”
And the little girl said, “Oh, don’t worry,
Mom. I didn’t use the new flyswatter. I used the old one.”
Happy News!
Authorities say a Labrador retriever named Jet really can fly. The 65-pound dog
survived a six story leap from a
airport parking garage and lived. Police and Jet’s owners and vet say the
2-year old accidentally leaped over a parking garage railing on New Year’s Eve
and walked away from the landing – 60 to 80 feet below.
Jet spent the night
at a vet’s office with a collapsed lung and some cuts and bruises. But by the
next day, the dog was getting antsy again.
His owners are Clayton and Jessica Tieman of
the sheen of his black fur, not for any flying abilities. They say their next
dog will get a more earthly name, perhaps Scooter.
Effective reporting
A biker is riding by the zoo,
when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion’s cage. Suddenly, the lion
grabs her by the cuff of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter
her, under the eyes of her screaming parents.
The biker jumps off his bike,
runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch.
Whimpering from the pain the lion jumps back, letting go of the girl. The biker
brings her to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly.
A reporter has seen the whole
scene, and addressing the biker, says – “Sir, this was the most gallant
and brave thing I saw a man do in my whole life.”
“It was nothing, really,
the lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger, and SOMEBODY
had to save her.”
“Well, I’ll make sure this
won’t go unnoticed. I’m a journalist, you know”, the reporter said,
“and tomorrow’s papers will have this on the first page. What motorcycle
do you drive?”
“A Harley Davidson.”
The journalist leaves.
The following morning the biker
buys the paper to see if it indeed brings news of his actions, and reads, on
first page:
A Harley DAVIDSON BIKER GANG MEMBER ASSAULTS
AFRICAN IMMIGRANT AND STEALS HIS LUNCH.
