I told my family I never want to depend on a machine and fluids to keep me alive…that’s when they took away my computer and coffee maker!
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When you go to the zoo
I bet when you go to the zoo you have to buy two tickets: One to get in and another to get out.
Six months to live
My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn’t pay the bill he gave me six months more. Walter Matthau
What to do next
“Keyboard not detected – press F1 to continue.”
The second mouse
The second mouse gets the cheese.