humor

240910

Practise

A couple phoned a neighbor to extend birthday greetings. They dialed the number and then sang "Happy Birthday" to him.

But when they finished their off-key rendition, they discovered that they had dialed the wrong number. "Don't let it bother you," said a strange but amused voice. "You folks need all the practice you can get."

 

Waisting money

A tightwad was convinced by a friend to buy a couple of lottery tickets. But after he won the big prize he didn't seem happy.

"What's wrong?" the friend asked. "You just became a millionaire!"

"I know," he groaned, "But I can't imagine why I bought that second ticket!"

 

Haircut

A pastor, known for his lengthy sermons, noticed a man get up and leave during the middle of his message.  The man returned just before the conclusion of the service. Afterwards the pastor asked the man where he had gone.

"I went to get a haircut," was the reply.

"But," said the pastor, "why didn't you do that before the service?"

"Because," the gentleman said, "I didn't need one then."