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Red duck

A kindergarten teacher handed out a coloring page to her class. On it was a picture of a duck holding an umbrella.

The teacher told her class to color the duck in yellow and the umbrella green. But little Johnny, who always does things HIS way, colored the duck a bright fire.

After seeing this, the teacher asked him: "Johnny, how many times have you seen a red duck?"

Young Johnny replied with "The same number of times I've seen a duck holding an umbrella."

Pastor’s son

The minister of a well-attended, strong, and enthusiastic church often showed himself ready and able to deal with any situation that might come up.

One Sunday, just as the minister was reaching the peak of his sermon, his own young son entered the church, ran to the center aisle, started making loud beeps and brrrmms like a car without a muffler, then zoomed right toward him.

The minister stopped his sermon, pointed directly at his son, and commanded, "Jimmy, park the car immediately beside your mother on that bench (pointing), turn off the ignition, and hand her the keys."

The sermon continued undisturbed after a good laugh by the congregation.

Big God

This is a story about a little girl who, on the way home from church, turned to her mother and said, "Mommy, the Preacher's sermon this morning confused me."

The mother said, "Oh! Why is that?"

The girl replied, "Well, he said that God is bigger than we are. Is that true?"

"Yes, that's true," the mother replied.

"He also said that God lives within us. Is that true, too?"

Again the mother replied, "Yes."

"Well," said the girl. "If God is bigger than us and He lives in us, wouldn't He show through?"