020211

One Way To Look At It!

"It's snowing still," said Eeyore gloomily.

"So it is."

"And freezing."

"Is it?"

"Yes," said Eeyore.

"However," he said, brightening up a little,

"we haven't had an earthquake lately."

Census Taker

An old man was sitting on his porch, when a young man walked up with a pad and pencil in his hand.

"What are you selling, young man?" he asked.

"I'm not selling anything, sir," the young man replied. "I'm the census taker."

"A what?" the man asked.

"A census taker. We are trying to find out how many people are in South Africa."

"Well," the man answered, "you're wasting your time with me; I have no idea."

 

Mischievous Grandkids

My daughter spent the night over at my mom's house one weekend. She is 3 and full of mischief.

My mom told her, "You must behave if you want to stay again overnight.”

My daughter looked at her and said, "Yes your Majesty Princess Gramma of Coolness!"

 

Rasing funds

There was a college student trying to earn some pocket money by going from house to house offering to do odd jobs.  He explained this to a man who answered one door.

"How much will you charge to paint my porch?" asked the man.

"Forty dollars."

"Fine" said the man, and gave the student the paint and brushes.

Three hours later the paint-splattered lad knocked on the door again.

"All done!", he says, and collects his money.

"By the way," the student says, "That's not a Porsche, it's a Ferrari."