Not to be eaten
Little Johnny returned from grocery shopping with his mother.
While she was putting away the groceries, he was busy spread- ing his animal crackers all over the kitchen table.
"Why are you doing that?" his mom asked.
"Well," said Little Johnny, "the box says you shouldn't eat them if the seal is broken. I'm looking for the seal!"
The Lords Prayer
Two little girls were overheard reciting the Lord's prayer in church:
"...And forgive us our trash passes as we forgive those who pass trash against us."
It was the kindergarten teacher's birthday and the students decided that they would each buy their teacher a gift.
The first student, whose parents own a florist shop, gave her a present. She held it and said, "I guess that it is flowers."
"How did you guess?" asked the little boy. She laughed and thanked him.
The second student, whose parents own a candy store, gave her a present. She held it and said, "I guess that is some candy."
"How did you guess?" asked the little boy. She again laughed and thanked him also.
The third student, whose parents own a bottle shop, gave her a box which was leaking. The teacher touched the liquid with her finger and tasted it. "Mmmmm is it wine?" she asked.
"No," said the little girl. So she tasted it again. "Is it champagne?" she asked.
"Noooooooo," replied the little girl, "It's a puppy!"