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"Tea Service"

One day my mother was out and my dad was looking after me.

I was maybe 2 1/2 years old and had just recovered from a bad cold. Someone had given me a little tea set as a get-well gift and it was one of my favorite toys.

Dad was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when I brought Daddy a little cup of "tea," which was just water. After several cups of tea and lots of praise for such good tea, my mom came home.

Dad made her wait in the living room to watch me bring him a cup of tea. ("It's just the cutest thing!") My mom waited and sure enough, I came down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy. She watched him drink it, then said (as only a mother would)..."Did it ever occur to you that the only place she can reach to get water is from the toilet?"

"Lessons Learned"

"One of my co-workers got a speeding ticket and was attending a defensive-driving course to have points erased from his license. The instructor, a police officer, emphasized that being on time was crucial and that the classroom doors would be locked when each session began.

Just after one class started, someone knocked on the locked door. The officer opened it and asked, "Why are you late?"

The student replied, "I was trying not to get another ticket." The officer let him in."

Expected when?

A friend had a waitressing position open at his diner and asked job seekers to fill out an application. Under "Salary Expected," someone wrote "Friday."