A little boy found the old family Bible and started thumbing through the pages. As he was turning the yellowed pages, a pressed tree leaf fell out.
He exclaimed, "Hey, this must be where Adam and Eve left their clothes!"
As a premed student at University, I had to take a difficult class in physics. One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept.
A student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this stuff?"
"To save lives," the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture.
A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again, "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted.
"It keeps the ignorant out of medical school," replied the professor.
Late for Sunday School
A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running to church as fast as she could, trying not to be late for Bible class.
As she ran she prayed, "Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! Dear Lord, please don't let me be late!"
While she was running and praying, she tripped on a curb and fell, getting her clothes dirty and tearing her dress. She got up, brushed herself off, and started running again.
As she ran she once again began to pray, "Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! But please don't shove me either!"