A man, submitting information for his income tax, was asked how many dependents he had.
"Eight," he replied.
The Taxman asked, "Would you mind repeating that?"
The man replied, "Not if I can help it."
John and Charles were sitting on the front porch chillin' when a large truck hauling rolls and rolls of grass went by.
"I'm gonna do that when I win the lottery," said John.
"Do what?" asked Charles.
"Send my grass out to be mowed," answered John.
A gentleman entered a busy florist shop that displayed a large sign that read, "Say It With Flowers."
"Please wrap up one rose," he told the florist.
"Only one?" the florist asked.
"Just one," the customer replied. "I'm a man of few words."