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Tax forms

A man, submitting information for his income tax, was asked how many dependents he had.

"Eight," he replied.

The Taxman asked, "Would you mind repeating that?"

The man replied, "Not if I can help it."

Lottery funny

John and Charles were sitting on the front porch chillin' when a large truck hauling rolls and rolls of grass went by.

"I'm gonna do that when I win the lottery," said John.

"Do what?" asked Charles.

"Send my grass out to be mowed," answered John.

Flowers

A gentleman entered a busy florist shop that displayed a large sign that read, "Say It With Flowers."

"Please wrap up one rose," he told the florist.

"Only one?" the florist asked.

"Just one," the customer replied. "I'm a man of few words."