Kids stuff

JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read, "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned to salt." Concerned, James asked, "What happened to the flea?"

NIKKI (age 4) was listening intently to the Sunday sermon. "Dear Lord," the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven and a rapturous look on his upturned face. "Without you, we are but dust." He would have continued, but at that moment Nikki leaned over to her mom and asked quite audibly in her shrill little four-year-old girl voice, "Mom, what is butt dust?"

MAX (age 4) to his dad: "Dark Vader's not the boss of me! Dad, if he ever tried to kill you I'd do something awesome to him!"

Second opinion

She had been thinking about coloring her hair. One day while going through a magazine, she came across an ad for a hair coloring product featuring a beautiful young model with hair a shade that she liked.

Wanting a second opinion, she asked her husband, "How do you think this color would look on a face with a few wrinkles?"

He looked at the picture, crumbled it up, straightened it out and studied it again. "Just great, hon."


After I took a job at a small publishing house, the first books I was assigned to edit were all on the topic of dieting.

"Isn't the market flooded with these types of books?" I asked another editor. "How do we expect to turn a profit?"

"Don't worry," he assured me. "These books appeal to a wide audience."