180609Checking antecedents

An important politician was seen moving around with a film actress for a couple of months, with whom he finally decided to plunge into matrimony.

But being cautious, he hired a private detective for the job of looking into her antecedents and finding out if she had any previous affairs with men.

After a few days, the politician at last received his detective's report, which went like this:

"Sir, this lady has a spotless reputation. Her past is clear; her family and friends all come from a very respectable background. No one has anything against her character. But yes, according to the grapevine, for the last couple of months she's been frequently seen flirting with a politician with a dubious reputation."

The difference

A teacher was asking her class: "What is the difference between 'unlawful' and 'illegal'?"

Only one hand shot up.

"Ok, answer, Joan" said the teacher.

"'Unlawful' is when u do something the law doesn't allow and 'illegal' is a sick eagle."

Did you copy it?

Teacher: Simon, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did u copy his?

Simon: No, teacher, it's the same dog!

What part?

Teacher: "Where were u born?"

Student: " Singapore , Sir."

Teacher: "Which part?"

Student: "All of me, Sir."